Since I was 12 years old, I have been a "Transformers" fan.
I am sure this is Kimbers fault, but nonetheless.
I bought one the other day.
His name is "Snarl".
"What's to stop a 34 year old, intelligent woman from figuring out how these wee toys work anyway!" I thought this in a fit of self-confidence.
But there's so much plastic and binding and twirly things holding it in...I can barely get past these impediments!!
"Come to me, my little toy! I release you from your twirly-binding plastic things!" (Hey, I might be able to use those for later!)
When I finally freed him from his plastic torture, I was too afraid of doing anything with him for fear of breaking him!
I can't quite figure out how to transform him; I know, I'll pretend to follow the step-by-step instructions.
Hmmm....seems to me it's indicating that I need to stick some kind of photon gun up his (ahem).
OH! It's his TAIL! His tail is actually a projectile launching "magnetic induction cannon or sword"!
This is so exciting!
Okay. One 'projectile magnetic butt thingy" and What?? Now I have to remove the butt projectile thingy to proceed?
Okay.
Alright. And now...rotate his hind legs so some guys head appears.
It was getting very strange.
Where's an eight year old when you need one!?!
Oh my.
My Snarl appears to have several wavering heads and a few limbs that are as of yet undetermined on this planet.
Egads!!
I've created a monster!
But c'mon.
I mean, he's a bit pigeon-toed and has several odd malformed heads shooting off in all directions, but he sort of inspires fear. And dread.
Dontcha think?
I know I'll be having nightmares.
17 comments:
You got him because he's a wolf, right? I think he's a wolf. I don't remember him form my childhood (OK, teen) facinaton with the Transformers.
I always liked the Dinobots best.
Wait.... his head comes out of his butt? That just doesn't sound sanitary. Nor does it inspire fear; it actually makes me wince.
My love of Transformers was Mike's fault. Let's cast the blame on him. *wink*
I like it!
Whoa. Two posts in two days? Farting hounds and transformers?
Hmm. Well, just glad you're posting! :-) Cheers my lovely!
That is so fricking hilarious. I love that you bought it, and took the hours to try to figure it out, and ended up with a mutant anyway. We should all spend more time doing things like this.
A transformer lover who can't get them to transform...
It's the greatest tradgey on earth. ;)
Steve~
Yes, having an 8 year old in the house really does help! My secret pleasures are playing Play-do, Lego, Hotwheels, Playmobil and of course Transformers! I am so lucky to have had sons so I have so MANY of these things around. My other former pleasures like silly crafts with glue and paint have been thoroughly SQUASHED by the grown-up anxieties of making such a huge mess that it does permanent damage to furniture.... ah well.
I know more about Transformers than I ever thought I would, thanks to my son. Did you know there are three different kinds of Megatron available this holiday season?
I like Harry Potter Legos myself. Easier to figure out...
OK, just take your whole post and pretend you are talking about a person and you will be rolling on the floor!!!
OK, you need a 8-10 year old kid to help you do the transformer thing.
Well, it sounds as if the dog in the beauty shop also had a projectile launching magnetic induction cannon.
I could never figure transformers out. I mean, people actually design these things. How do they do it?
I could meet you half way and my 8-year old would be happy to help you out. LOL
Those things really are little engineering marvels... Good luck with it!
I quake and tremble in fear. And dread. Really. I do.
You have far more patence than I do. If it take directions and multiple poking and removing....I'm out. You did a magnificent job!
And the gaseous doggie salon was a great read too. Glad I didn't experience that personally.
Did you try making the special "transforming" sound from the TV show? That'll help. ^_^
A guy I know told me his son is getting several Transformers tattooed on one arm, and several of their rivals, (The Decepticons?), tattooed on the other arm. Said his son wanted something no one else would have.
I think the kid's safe on that one.
This post is hilarious! Your creation has a twist of Picasso and perhaps Dali. Cool! A modern art Transformer! ;)
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