Friday, November 30, 2007

Strange memories.

Many years ago, I worked as a florist.
I designed many arrangements and as a bonus, I got to deliver them as well.

On one occasion, I was to deliver a 'Get Well' bouquet.
The house I pulled up in front of was old and odd and ramshackle. The yard had grown wild and was swallowing the house.

I climbed the rickety stairs, not sure what I was going to find, but the golden eyed cats that followed felt reassuring to me.

The door opened to an equally untamed looking old man. He had the look more of absent-minded untidy bachelor than anything else.
Looking surprised to see me, he graciously took the bouquet, explaining sotto voce that the flowers must be for his wife, Jenny, who was lying in the other room.

I commented on the beautiful cats that had gathered around his feet. By this time 4 of the sleek black beasts had emerged from the shadows and were lolling about.

"Ah!" He sounded excited. "Do you know what kind of cats they are?"
I shook my head.
"These are the beautiful Bombay cats, breed for their golden eyes. My wife loves them, and they're very gentle. Do you like cats? Do you have a minute?"

I said yes to both questions.

He vanished back into the dark house and re-emerged a moment later with a beautiful book about cats, to which he had already turned to the pages on the Bombays.

I don't remember much about the actual words he spoke, or the information he imparted. But I remember clearly the excitement and enjoyment he obviously was experiencing at sharing his love and knowledge with someone.

Eventually I had to leave. Work has a way of interfering in real life.

A month later the flower shop received an order for an 'In Sympathy' bouquet. I piled it into the van, checked the address and off I went.

It wasn't till I was almost in front of that same house that I realized what had happened.

Jenny must have died from her illness.
I felt so sad and sick.

The cats didn't come out from their shadows and no one answered the door.

I had to leave the bouquet on the front step.

I'll always wonder about that man.
How he coped.
If he coped.

I'll never forget how happy he was to share something of himself that day, though his wife must have surely been very ill at that point.

I wished that he had been home so I could have expressed my sorrow, patted the cats, said something. Thanked him.

And he's stayed in my memory all these years. Him, his 'beautiful Bombay cats' and his wife Jenny, to whom I delivered flowers to twice, but who I never, ever saw.

A Vase of Flowers
Paul Gaugin

Friday, November 23, 2007

On announcing what's better left unsaid.

This morning I saw a parked 1996 black Pontiac Sunfire with an air-freshener that read as follows:

"I my penis".
For once, I'm at a loss to describe accurately my series of thoughts on that statement. But I do have a series of questions regarding this bold announcement.

First. Why!?! WHY did this person find it necessary to relay this information to the world?

Second. Is penis some new 'werd' for something else? Am I so non courant that there's some other meaning for this word that I'm not aware of? Is this person (and honestly, it's uncertain if they be male or female) making a reference to some new thing?
Third. Does displaying this...this...this reference of self-adoration expected to bring in exclamations of congratulations? Because I'm telling ya, my response is to steer clear and shoot disgusted looks at the owner. Among other things.
That's all.
I remain perplexed and more than a little grossed out.

Monday, November 19, 2007

All's quiet over here.

After the drama of last weekend, I'm pleased to say that this week and end has been quiet. No trees falling, no crushed cars and no interviews.
Peace has returned.

Due to last weeks incident, I have been reflecting on my car luck ("carma"?). Out of 5 cars I've owned, all but one has suffered the slings and arrows.
One of my vehicles (an older Honda Prelude) was stolen 2 twice and broken into more times than I can count.
Some desperate person even peeled the passenger door away from the frame of the poor car to get in late one night.
All that effort for an ashtray. It was never recovered.

My current car also suffered. It, too, was stolen twice. The second time I actually heard it being stolen as I lay in my bed.
I had arrived home around 11:00pm and snuggled into my bed 20 minutes later preparing to sleep. I was surprised when I heard a car start up...sounded just like mine with that give-away fan belt screech.
"That's my car!" I thought. "No. That's silly. Must be another car with that same ailment."
"No. That really IS my car!"

I jumped out of bed, pulled on some shoes and went racing downstairs prepared to do battle. In retrospect, that was a bad idea but I didn't stop to think about it at the time. Someone was stealing MY car! car was gone.
The next day, I saw my upstairs neighbour and told him what had happened.
"Oh no." He said. "I saw your car peel out of the parking lot and thought it was you. I actually had to step out of the way so the car could get by. I couldn't see in!"

The same car also suffered from being rear-ended by a police officer. As it was pouring rain at the time (it was truly torrential) he opted not to get out of his vehicle, and instead I was forced to stand shivering in the rain in order to get his insurance/license information. And then he tried to blame me for stopping too short.
I mentioned that the large van pulling out in front of me rather forced my hand, but he remained unamused and appeared rather annoyed during the whole exchange.

So there you have it.

This may explain why I was able to take the car crushing tree of last week so calmly.
It's not like it's the first time something like that has happened!

Perhaps the Universe, in an effort to make up for it's past indiscretions and to balance things out a little, may consider presenting me with a new car? Preferably in silver? With the initials BMW emblazoned on the grill?
You know, the pendulum has to swing the other way too, sometimes!

Monday, November 12, 2007

It started out to be such a nice weekend.

My long weekend started out like any other. I traveled to the lovely town of Courtenay, BC where my friends and family reside. I had a great time with my Mom and Dad and Kimber and Spider Girl.

Then we went for a trip through an unusual art display born from George Sawchuck's imagination and created entirely by him, a few wooded acres and his chainsaw. It stood complete with 'shrunken heads' hanging from trees and wooden salmon floating in ponds.

And then?

And then a tree fell on my car.

And then the television crews showed up. (Two of them, as a matter of fact! Not to mention the newspaper reporter.)

The first windstorm of 2007 downed a huge tree that just happened to fall directly on to my car. (Well, truth be told, it's Whatshisface's car, but nonetheless.)

I had awoken to a cacophonous crash, then SpiderGirl shouting "TAI! TAI!! TAI!!!!!!!!!" I thought a tree had fallen through her house where I was a guest. But no.

It was a great huge tree falling across my car, instead.

I have to say, it's not the most pleasant way to wake up!

After much fussing and calls to the police, Hydro came and cut the offending tree away, leaving my car dented, damaged and ill equipped for travel.

The train seemed like a good idea, so I popped in to the train station to see if I could book a ticket for Tuesday afternoon. What providence! There was Ian from 'Or so I thought' and his lovely wife Wendy. Wendy, too, had to get back to Victoria and was catching the train.

After some discussion, my Mom and Dad decided to drive me the 300km (200+miles) from Courtenay to Victoria to ensure I got to work bright and early Tuesday morning. (Gee, thanks Mom and Dad.)

Once I returned home, my neighbour rushed over, "Was that YOU on t.v.? I just saw! Are you okay?"

I logged in to check my blog, and I saw that dear Josie from 'C'est La Vie' had sent a comment, "Were you just on tv??"

It seems I've had my 15 minutes of fame, and I didn't even get to see it! We have no cable, you see.

I hope my hair looked ok, I mean, it was pretty windy out. (Heh!)

Thursday, November 08, 2007


I had a huge long post about genetically modified organisms, 'pharming', and 'frankenfood' that I wanted to put up...but it's vanished most unexpectedly. (Lucky for you!)
Besides, my ignorance about biotechnology is vast and far reaching, and I would hate to demonstrate it in front of all of you fine people (I say that like I've never let it happen before!).

But hear me out here...there's one thing about GMO's that makes me nervous.

It makes me nervous that there isn't any labelling to tell me what I'm putting in my mouth. Shouldn't there at least be a label which would allow me to make an 'informed' purchase?

It's argued that even before Gregor Mendel we've been dabbling in genetics; we've always adjusted our food to better suit us so what's the problem with it now?

Well, I supposed that's true. To a degree.

But somehow I don't believe that Mendel foresaw us splicing fish gene's into soybeans. Or being able to create a 'suicide seed' that allows only one harvest with no viable seed for next year. (Which is certainly an effective way of cornering the market! Patent your hi-tech seed. Buy all other non-engineered competing seed companies. Make your seed 'terminate' after a single harvest. Et voila! A monopoly.)

And it's not to say that I would instantly argue that biotech is going to destroy our planet and gobble itself into nothing due to sheer greed.

I won't instantly argue that, but truth be told, I'm baffled as to how to truly educated myself on this subject.

Everyone involved in this has diametrically opposed views, and most of what's written about it scans more like propaganda than intelligent argument.

So I don't know.
What do you think?

Thursday, November 01, 2007


1. Name one person who made you laugh last night? Whathisface! He always makes me laugh.

2. What were you doing at 0800? Work! Work! Work!

3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Work! Work! Work! (Okay, I lie. I was blogging.)

4. What happened to you in 2006? I quit my job and moved to a new city. How's that?

5. What was the last thing you said out loud? "Rhonda? Heloise? Miranda? Patricia?"

6. How many beverages did you have today? One cup of tea and one cup of apple juice and one cup of water.

7. What color is your hairbrush? Black and hairy.

8. What was the last thing you paid for? I was supposed to pay for that?

9.Where were you last night? Completely secured behind double locked doors. At home. Honest!

10. What color is your front door? White. And brown. I have two front doors. (see how nicely that ties into question # 9?)

11. Where do you keep your change? My change exists in my mind, waiting for the right moment to emerge, a butterfly from a shriveled cocoon. Did I misunderstand the question?

12. What’s the weather like today? Not raining. When you live in a 'rain-forest' there are only two types of weather. Raining and Not Raining. So it's fabulous today!

13. What’s the best ice-cream flavor? I once had Gorgonzola and pear flavored ice-cream. That rocked. Otherwise? Meh.

14. What excites you? Buckling into my seat on the plane, hearing the engines roar, and knowing that I'm about to embark on a grand adventure. This was Kimber's answer, but it was so good that I just had to use it. Thanks Kimber!

15. Do you want to cut your hair? Why, does it look that bad?

16. Are you over the age of 25? Yes, by a whole crazy decade!

17. Do you talk a lot? Me? Talk a lot? Like go on and on to anyone about anything? Or does this refer to blathering at strangers in line ups, or chatting with employees over the phone? Nah. Can hardly get a word out of me.

18. Do you watch the O.C.? The what? The Ocean Cartographer? The Other Chowder? The Ornery Child? These questions are tough.

19. Do you know anyone named Steven? Yes! And...what? That's it? Checking up on me, eh?

20. Do you make up your own words? Are you referring to portmanteaus? Well, why didn't you just say so? I don't make up words, but I spell real ones wrong often enough to have them become words in their own right. 'Stuipd' comes to mind.

21. Are you a jealous person? No way!

22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘A’. No. I won't do it.

23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘K’. Sure is a lot of concern around the letters my friends names begin with. Must be some kind of psychosis.

24. Who’s the first person on your received call list? Eh?

25. What does the last text message you received say? What's that? Text message you say?

26. Do you chew on your straw? Nope. Hay, but never straw.

27. Do you have curly hair? Nope.

28. Where’s the next place you’re going to? I think I'm going to hop on a plane and head to Phoenix one of these days! I'd like to see a desert.

29. Who’s the rudest person in your life? There once was an evil bosslady name Agnes. She had bloody claws and flaming nostrils and could swallow a person's self esteem whole. And she was also very rude.

30. What was the last thing you ate? A Quaker Honey and Oats bar. Mmmmm.

31. Will you get married in the future? Yup.

32. What’s the best movie you’ve seen in the past 2 weeks? I just watched "Shallow Grave" last night, it was so sinister. Just great!

33. Is there anyone you like right now? What a weird question! There are so many people that I like right now. Is this question supposed to be directed to a person who normally hates the world or something?

34. When was the last time you did the dishes? Sunday? Monday? Hard to say, I try to block those incidences from my mind!

35. Are you currently depressed? Ha!

36. Did you cry today? No, why? Going to prescribe something?

37. Why did you answer and post this? 'Cus Kimber told me too! And besides, it's kinda fun!